Ahhh, the seating plan. The stuff of late-night cold sweats and dreaded Post-it note Tetris. How will you sit people? Who will get on with who (and worse ' who won't get on with who?)? What about your Auntie Edie who's not talking to your cousin James who's got a new girlfriend who just happens to be best man Tony's ex… and don't even think about throwing kids into the mix. OK, we might be exaggerating, but when it comes to seating plans, just take a deep breath, and take the advice of our wedding planning experts, Jessica from Ardour & Bow (ardourandbow.co.uk) and Rebecca from The Unique Cornish Event Company (theuniquecornishevent.co.uk) and Jenny from Jenny Wren Weddings & Events (jennywrenweddingsandevents.co.uk).

However, if you've opted for a more formal sit-down wedding breakfast or have a lot of guests, then a seating plan comes highly recommended to help with the organisation and flow of the day. 'Even if you don't like the formality of one, not having a seating plan can result in couples or families not being able to sit together, as there may be single chairs left at tables,' warns Jenny.
Meals tend to take around two hours at weddings, so it's important you've got this part of your day sorted.

'Seating plans are also very helpful in introducing friends to like-minded guests, ensuring your closest friends and family are near to the top table, and avoiding any confusion or awkward moments if guests come in later and might have to split up to find spare seats!' says Jessica. 'Plus, a seating plan will assist the caterers in knowing where any guests with dietary requirements or allergies are going to be,' says Rebecca.


A Thing Like That

The table debate
So let's say a seating plan is required. Here's where some decisions need to be made regarding the type of tables, how many guests you sit at each and the configurations. You'll be guided in part by the layout of your wedding venue, and the first thing to do is to get a floor plan from your venue or marquee supplier. Determine how much space you have, and bear in mind that round tables tend to allow you to have more people and offer a more formal dining experience than banquet-style trestle tables.


Emma Stoner

'I think there's a misconception that round tables work better as you can talk to more people, but I actually think trestle tables are better for this,' says Jenny. 'With a round table of 10 people you are quite far from the guests opposite you, whereas with a trestle table you can easily chat to the people either side of you and the three opposite you.'

Think about what you want to achieve and whether you're hoping to create an intimate mood or a lively atmosphere.

'Consider the type of food service you've chosen ' be mindful if you are going to have lots of dishes served at the table,' says Jessica. 'Work out how many people can comfortably sit at each table of your chosen style, and make sure you allow enough space between tables for food service to weave around the room,' she adds.

Who goes where?
So you've chosen what type of tables you want and how they'll be set up ' now you have to decide who will be seated where. 'I'm keen on using the help of technology when planning, and if you haven't enlisted the help of a wedding planner then there are online systems that can help you create a seating plan, such as toptableplanner.com, or allseated.com,' says Jessica.

'Start with the top table ' who are you going to have sitting next to you' she continues. 'Is it just your immediate family, or will it be a mix of family and friends? If you are having a maid of honour and a best man then they would traditionally be placed at the top table as well, along with parents. Next, have a look at the tables nearest to you and allocate your closest friends and family to those tables, so they are close to the action. When allocating seating, you might also like to consider where each person will be sitting in relation to their view of the top table ' it's always nice to ensure that, for example, your grandparents have a direct view of you both.'

If you don't want the traditional set up of parents on the top table then create two tables next to the top table with each set of parents, suggests Rebecca. 'It's become more popular now to have close friends and bridesmaids and best men on the top table, with parents hosting their own tables with family or their friends,' she says. 'This also allows you to solve any problems if parents are no longer together.'

Alternatively, you could opt for a romantic 'sweetheart' table for just the two of you, avoiding the need to have the traditional top table format. 'That way you don't have to make any decisions about who else will be sitting with you, and it gives you some precious time for just the two of you to chat!' says Jenny.

'Don't feel that you have to keep to prescribed layouts ' be creative and challenge the conventional norms,' says Jessica. 'At a recent wedding the bride decided she wanted to have the top table in the middle of the room; it worked perfectly and enabled everyone to have a great view of the wedding party, and ensured that the couple were surrounded by all their friends and family.'

Special guests
As well as figuring out who's sitting where, with whom, and how it's all going to work, there might be one or two other guests to consider.

'Think about particular guests' requirements: maybe one of your guests will be using a wheelchair, so consider the access to the table,' reminds Jessica. 'And if you are having dancing in the same room, you might also like to place any guests that might be affected by the loud music slightly further away.'

If you're having children at your wedding, next comes the conundrum of whether to sit them all at one table and, if so, whether to seat any adults with them. 'I think any child younger than around seven needs to be kept near their parents,' says Rebecca. 'Older children should be OK to sit at a table with other children, so long as you have given them things to do and you don't mind a little noise during the speeches.'

And, as Jessica points out, the kids won't be sat at the table for long! 'I've seen plenty of weddings where the kids only sit at the table for as long as the food service, and then they like to get up and moving,' she says. 'If you are likely to have lots of kids, then a kids table is a good idea, provided there are gifts or games at the table to keep them all entertained.'

Looking good
Once you've finalised your seating plan (well done!), you'll need to pass it on to your caterer so they know the location of your guests and especially those who have dietary requirements or allergies. It's also time to think about the fun bit ' how to display it!

'There are so many ideas, such as 'find your face' photographs of the guests with the table number written underneath pegged on a wooden frame, which is fun and interactive!' suggests Jenny. 'Or perhaps beautiful calligraphy on a glass window frame, pots of herbs with wooden plant sticks in with the names and table number on, or wine bottles with table names and guests attached.'

Seating plans need to be fairly easy to read for a large group of people, so consider space and height. 'There's so many great ways to create seating plans nowadays, which can add to the overall style of your wedding. I've seen a cool surfboard table plan ' being in Cornwall and by the sea, it's perfect,' says Rebecca. 'One couple created a gigantic world map with pins of all the places they had visited together, and to the side was the seating plan with table names of these countries.' Also think about who will be designing your table plan. 'If you're not that confident creatively, then put the job into the hands of a stationery designer who can create a perfect suite of printed elements for the day including large table plans, menus and place settings as well as invitations,' says Rebecca.

And don't forget to consider how you will identify the tables themselves. 'This could be with numbers or something more personal, such as photos of places you've both visited together,' says Jessica. 'You will also need to consider whether to have individual seat place cards, or allow guests to sit where they choose at the table.'

Finally, although it will be one of the last things you'll be organising (as you'll need those pesky RSVPs back first!) don't leave it too late; it might take you a couple of goes to get it right and the more time you allow, the better. 'This is not something to get stressed about though,' reminds Rebecca. 'If you give yourself the time then you can afford to play a little.'

TAKE A SEAT!

Creating a seating plan can feel like a puzzle of personalities, but it doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Experts recommend first considering your wedding style—if a relaxed, picnic-style reception fits your vision, an informal seating arrangement might be ideal. And if you’re interested in crafting these kinds of memorable events for others, exploring wedding planner roles in Bristol could be a great step into this creative, detail-oriented industry.

Jenny Wren Weddings & Events jennywrenweddingsandevents.co.uk
Knots & Kisses knotsandkisses.co.uk