It's true that many guests can't wait to finish the legal and religious formalities before loosening their ties and embarking on the post-ceremony celebrations, but what if you gave them something equally as exciting, meaningful and inventive at the very start of proceedings?
Freckle Photography
As couples increasingly contemplate the personality factor of every aspect of the day, the modern ceremony has become more than a formulaic right of passage, with a look and atmosphere that gives the after-party a real run for its money.
We've enlisted Nicola Le Couteur Bisson and Denise Whitehair of The Cornish Celebrants (cornishcelebrants.co.uk) to offer some inspiration for planning a wow-worthy ceremony.
The vows
From selecting your vows to writing your own, there's a world of ways to inject some character into this incredibly important moment and ensure it's full of meaning and personality.
If you're staging a religious ceremony, there will be certain restrictions and traditions (there's a legal form of words that must be followed), so always discuss the details with your minister first. They might be happy for you to customise certain aspects while remaining respectful to the religious conventions you've chosen. For a civil ceremony, again, you will have to check the protocol with the local register office. "You will have a choice of vows, and some Local Authority Registration Services will allow you to write your own," advises Nicola.
Megan Welker
If you want to have complete freedom concerning your vows, then a ceremony conducted by a celebrant is worth considering. "They will work with you to incorporate all your wishes into the ceremony, this could include spiritual or religious references or prayers, songs or rituals such as a ring blessing, handfasting or sand ceremony," says Denise. "Music, readings and writing your own vows are also encouraged."
If you're keen to write your own vows, there are some essentials to consider. "Think about your audience!" advises Nicola. "Remember your grandparents may be there as you say your vows."
"If you're stuck for inspiration, look at poems and song lyrics and adapt them to suit," Denise suggests. Take a passage from your favourite novel, speech, piece of prose or fairy tale - or ask a family member or friend with wordsmith skills to write something especially for you. "Remember how important your vows are: a little humour is a nice touch but it doesn't work so well if the vows are all flippant," she warns. And less is often more. "Keep your vows to three-four sentences - you may find it difficult to read out or repeat two sides of A4 during the ceremony."
Don't forget the delivery, such as where you'll stand and who will say what. Though your guests will want to hear your vows, try and look at each other as you make these lifelong commitments.
Heather Birnie
The readings
The readings comprise an opportunity to personalise your ceremony further and communicate something deeply significant about you and your relationship - so don't be afraid to allow your imagination some free rein.
The most important thing is to select a reading you both love without unduly worrying about everyone else's opinion to ensure the sentiment will feel genuine and emotion-filled, rather than commonplace and contrived.
"Choose poems or prose that you like, or song lyrics can work well. Remember that readings do not necessarily need to be romantic - they could be about an activity or place that you both love," says Nicola. So long as you're being true to yourselves and your love, the emotional impact for both you and your audience will be in full and memorable force.
Pip & Simon
Though you may have an idea concerning who you'd like to deliver the readings, make sure you've taken into account the person's public speaking ability and appropriateness for the task. "Choose someone who is confident to read your chosen reading," advises Nicola. "And put the readings on card for them - large font is helpful!"
The music
The soundtrack to your ceremony affords you the opportunity to really go to town with the bespoke factor. From acoustic classical strings or a Celtic harpist to surprise wedding singers hidden in the congregation, gospel choirs, buskers, and performances from family and friends - there's a plethora to pick from.
"Choose pieces that you like rather than ones you think you ought to have," affirms Denise. Source your songbook from your personal playlist and arrange each recital to suit the atmosphere or venue, for example, ask a harpist to reinterpret your favourite rock track or a guitarist to strum your top film tune.
Claire Penn
"If you've chosen a song that you want everyone to sing make sure you provide the lyrics," says Nicola. A collective performance is a fun, crowd-pleasing and unforgettable way to commemorate your 'I dos' in individual style.
If you're playing a piece from a sound system, always check the acoustics first to ensure the sound quality and dispersal throughout the ceremony space. Similarly, any live acts must rehearse ahead of time to ensure a pitch-perfect performance.
Emma Solley
A TWIST ON TRADITION
Add your own spin to a conventional ceremony with these ideas from celebrants Nicola and Denise
"Most ceremonies will run along the basic lines of: bridal party entrance, giving away of the bride, vows, rings, signing of the register and couple's exit - with readings added throughout - but don't be afraid to update conventions," advises Nicola. Plan your own ceremony with individual variation, for example:
The bride and groom enter together with their family.
Both the bride and groom's parents are asked if they welcome their son or daughter's partner into their family.
Time is included for reflection for family members who are unable to attend or have passed away.
Rituals such as a handfasting, ring blessing, knot tying or sand ceremony are incorporated.
The support of family and friends is asked for.
Promises to each other are made followed by the vows.
Commitment vows to the couple's children and maybe the giving of gifts are incorporated.
Rings or another symbol of commitment are exchanged.
The register is signed.
A well wishing is given to the couple by guests.
The couple exits.
(With readings/songs added as desired throughout)
A Thing Like That
THE STYLISTICS
Wedding stylist, Elle Winsor Grime of Inspire Hire, shares some expert advice on designing a standout ceremony
Remember, not only is the ceremony the main event in terms of romance, it's the first impression that you give your guests of your wedding celebrations - so plan the elements carefully.
Reuse and recycle. Use elements in your ceremony styling that can be reused to complement your reception styling. We come up with lots of lovely ceremony styling ideas that can be moved so that the ceremony has a visual presence throughout the celebrations.
Flower power. Pedestal flower arrangements, pew ends and entrance area displays can all be moved to decorate your reception venue. Discuss this with your florist, wedding planner or stylist.
Aisle style. I'm a huge fan of a floral aisle: not only do they look great for an outdoor ceremony, they can add interest and an unexpected flourish to an indoor ceremony. Or how about using some fun personalised signs to line your aisle?
Pretty pews. Use plants in pots or lanterns instead of traditional pew ends. Not only do these create a more modern look, they are easier to reuse for the reception.
Set the scene. Consider the ceremony setting and how it will look. It's important to create a focal point and frame the area in which you will stand to say your vows. A ceremony arch can work well in some venues, while a solid backdrop works better in others. You may wish to see a 'view' behind you as you say 'I do' by framing this space with a floral display on either side, or you might use giant balloons for impact.
Vowed and amazed. Use your ceremony to create a stunning first impression for your guests. A traditional order of service can be used to deliver a special thank you to your guests for attending; it can also be a fun element giving your guests a teaser of what is to come: for example, for a beach ceremony we are crafting the order of service into a handy fan for guests to use!
Warm welcome. Creative signage is a fun way of building anticipation. Line the pathway to your ceremony with personalised signs guiding and welcoming your guests.
Lucy Turnbull
Gavin Conlan
Emma Solley
GRW Photography
Ben Photography
Keith Riley
words Hannah May
Copyright Wed magazine 2017
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