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Words Lucy Higgins, photo (above) Paul Keppel Photography
However organised you are, however far in advance you plan, however many spreadsheets you have - the fact of the matter is, something could go wrong at the wedding. Whether it's illness, arguments or a good old-fashioned downpour, here's your foolproof disaster plan to help you stay calm, whatever the woe...
What if it rains?
Living in England means, sadly, it might rain. While it's unlikely to tip it down all day, there's no guarantee the sun will poke its head out from behind the clouds or you'll get the al fresco ceremony that you've been dreaming of. However, there are a few easy ways to stop your big day becoming a big washout.
"Being ahead of the game is always a good idea," says wedding planner Tracy Edwards of Blue Fizz Events (bluefizzevents.co.uk). "With the great British climate consistently delivering changeable weather, make sure you have a wet weather plan to avoid any unnecessary stress and worry on the day itself."
Experts suggest making your Plan A an indoor or wet weather-appropriate one, with a Plan B for if the sun comes out. That way, sunshine or dry weather is an added bonus, and it's usually much easier to arrange for everyone to be outside last-minute, than to shepherd everyone inside when you're not expecting to. "For festival and boho-style weddings, encourage wellington boots and ponchos," suggests Tracy. You can also hire buckets of umbrellas so should the dreaded wet weather happen, you'll be prepared instead of stressed.
A supplier has just pulled out!
Although it's very unlikely, this can happen on occasion thanks to illness, injury or some terribly bad luck. However, most suppliers will have a network of similar professionals in the industry and will be quick to recommend someone else who can take over for them. "It's also a good idea to have a list of 'go-to suppliers' who you know have availability and can react swiftly if needs be," suggests Tracy.
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What if I rip my dress?
"Always prepare an emergency box with items including a needle and thread," advises Tracy. Make sure it's well equipped with everything you'll need in case of spillages, rips or other mishaps, and stash it somewhere accessible on the morning of the wedding (this could be one of your bridesmaids' roles). Beforehand, identify someone who'll be at the ceremony and reception, and ask them if they're happy to be your designated dress-fixer. That way, if the worst happens, you can go straight to your plan without having to run around in a torn gown looking for someone to fix it!
Everything is running late!
This is one of the most common complaints after a wedding, but there are a few ways to avoid it. The first is to ensure you have a clear, written-down timeline for the day, and make sure everyone relevant has a copy. This includes the caterer, photographer and MC - as well as your bridal party. Then, pick one reliable person who can help keep you on track if you're spending too long during an element of the big day. While it's lovely to catch up with your old school friend, for example, you might be sad if you spend two hours with her and run out of time for your couple portraits, or have to rush the speeches because you spent too long cutting the cake. "Communication is key," reminds Tracy. "If things are running late on the day, make sure everyone involved knows how it will impact them and how to react accordingly."
Someone in my bridal party is ill!
A bridesmaid or usher getting sick on the day of the wedding is one thing you can't control, but it doesn't have to spell disaster for the day. "Pre-empt this unfortunate incident turning into a full-blown panic by ensuring that all the bridal party are privy to your timeline, and that they all know each other's roles and responsibilities," says Tracy. Make sure it's written down too; this way, anyone can step in and take on the additional role if they need to.
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What if there's an argument at the wedding?
While weddings are joyous, love-filled celebrations, be prepared that quarrels can happen. Having lots of family members - who often haven't seen each other for a long time, or may have been through divorces or feuds in the past - in one room may mean conversations get a little heated, but it's unlikely a full-blown row will break out - and if it does, most guests will be courteous enough to ensure you don't find out about it. However, to ease your worry in the lead-up, plan a passive intervention.
"There is always a calm head and a negotiator in any group - identify that person now!" says Tracy. Have a quiet word to them before the big day, and let them know which guests are likely to be the source of friction. Also, let this calm head know how you'd like any problem dealt with - is it to politely ask those involved to keep their voices down, to suggest they take the conversation outside, or even to ask one of them to leave for a while until tempers have simmered? By deciding in advance, you'll know exactly how the potential problem will be handled, which will leave more headspace for you to get on with enjoying your day.
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However, the most important thing to remember is that, even if one of these unfortunate events does occur, don't let it ruin your day. We've never heard of a single wedding where everything went exactly to plan, so the best thing you can do is take a deep breath, put a smile on your gorgeous face, and go with the flow.
