HERE'S LOOKING AT YOU
The moment is here. The groom stands, nervous and fidgety, at the front of the aisle. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he hears 'Canon In D' playing softly. Bridesmaids take their seats all around him. A deep breath: he is about to see his beautiful bride in her beautiful dress for the very first time. Except...they already saw each other an hour ago?!

What is a First Look?
An American tradition, which has steadily grown in popularity over the last 20 years, the first look is growing in popularity in the UK. Although it can manifest differently for each and every wedding day, simply put, it means when the soon-to-be-wedded couple see each other for the first time before the ceremony, just the two of them, with the moment typically caught on camera by the wedding photographer. The specifics aren't important. But the popular choice is to have only the bride and groom. No bridesmaids, no best men, no guests grabbing snaps - the whole idea is to keep the moment as intimate and private as possible.

Inspiration
So why might you think about having a first look? Being a relatively new phenomenon, it's probably not something your parents might suggest. "It was definitely our photographer (Natalie McKenzie Brown) who sowed the seeds of the first look," explains Becky Rance, who had her first look on Dartmoor (complete with wild ponies!)."Natalie had already done a few first look shoots and as soon as she mentioned it we fell in love with the idea. Seeing each other for the first time on your wedding day is such an emotional and exciting experience and we loved the idea of having that special moment all by ourselves - just us and the moor."

For others, the idea grew from the knowledge that, although the bride and groom may be side by side for the majority of their wedding day, they barely spend a moment alone. Katherine Taylor, whose first look was at Nancarrow Farm, saw the idea on a blog, and knew immediately that was the idea for her. "Knowing how manic the whole day would become, I wanted us to spend at least a few minutes together beforehand," she says.

And it's not just brides who fall in love with the idea."A first look made the logistics much easier. While our guests were being transported to the wedding we were already on-site taking photos," says groom, Ant. "Sometimes, when photos are taken after the ceremony, it can disconnect things as the wedding party and families separate from the other guests, so we were keen to avoid that."


Grace Elizabeth

But what about tradition?
First looks aren't for everyone, so consider the following before talking the leap:

Anticipation at the aisle: This is a big one. Does having a first look detract from the emotion of waiting at the altar? It certainly shifts the moment to a different point in the day, so the decision is whether or not you'd rather share that moment alone, or with your guests. You might find that older family members are sceptical at the idea of a first look, so you may have to keep schtum! Although having kept their secret all day, Katherine suggests that the nature of their morning was actually another positive: "We liked the idea of the guests assuming they were watching us see each other for the first time, when actually we had already done so - it cements that sense of being partners in crime!," she says.

Prying eyes: There's always the risk that other guests could see you: approaching your husband as he nervously waits is one thing, but being 'papped' by your excited guests is quite another. "There was a very funny moment where Eavan and I were walking towards the walled garden, only to have taxis carrying the guests and registrars driving towards us," recalls Katherine. "The wedding planner had to leave me to find my way while she went off and yelled at them to turn around so they wouldn't see me in my dress and ruin the moment!"

Keeping pristine: Hair, make-up and wedding dress are usually 100% perfect when everybody (not just the groom) first sees you. Even with beautiful sunshine, a stiff breeze can shift your hair, a kiss can smudge lipstick and your dress may pick up foliage. So if you're going to do a first look, it's worth factoring in 15 minutes for touch-ups.


Travers and Brown

Get the look!
Still not sure? You may be convinced by the following reasons for a first look shoot:

Photos: It's easy to see why your photographer might like to work with first looks: a raw, special moment shared with the happy couple, no pressure from guests to hurry it up, and some level of control over where it happens. All of this adds up to incredible imagery to help you remember that moment forever. "The photos were amazing, better than we had ever hoped," exclaims Becky. "We knew Natalie was a great photographer, but they honestly blew us away. Ian was standing facing away from me up on the moors and they shot me as I walked up behind him. We have some lovely pictures of that moment."

You're not the centre of attention: Although logistics may have been the initial factor in his thinking, Ant is keen to stress that when the time came, it was all the more emotional because of their decision. "Along with the practicality, the moment was also incredibly special. We were able to see each other on our terms instead of in front of over 100 people. It made it personal and intimate." And while the archetypal bride might love every moment of being the centre of attention, some people aren't happy with such sustained scrutiny. Walking down the aisle may be the most exciting 30 seconds of your life, but being self-conscious of looking over (or under) emotional is not something anybody wants on their big day. "Given that neither of us likes being the centre of attention, we were actually dreading seeing each other for the first time with 60 pairs of eyes on us," says Katherine. "We thought it would help overcome those initial nerves as I walked down the aisle. Grabbing a bit of time to ourselves, in secret, was really special and allowed a few tears to be shed in private. My favourite shot is of me walking towards Henry with his back towards me, with a big grin on my face. I think that summed up how happy I was to see him!" she says.

Something unique: "I liked doing something different," exclaims bride Jane Kitts, who had her first look at the Carbis Bay Hotel. This is one of the key draws: by breaking with tradition, you'll also be doing something unique. Neither the hotel wedding planner, nor the photographer, had done a first look before - and Jane was excited to be the first. "This was the first time he was seeing me in my wedding dress with no one watching us. As I walked towards him he could see my shadow getting closer before he turned around - we spent about five minutes together before I went back to my room. It was amazing to be able to have a loving moment with my husband-to-be," she says. Becky, meanwhile, was very conscious of how important this quality time would be. "It's time you may not get to spend together later in the day, as it all flies past. It's something a bit different and gives you a unique story to tell. I personally loved the intimacy of seeing my fiance before the ceremony without anyone else knowing."


Liberty Pearl Photography

Looking back
A wedding isn't just about the day itself, it's also about how the memories stay with you long after the day has passed. "We are totally glad we did it," says Becky. "We got to spend precious time together before the flurry of the day took hold. It was definitely something we both wanted to do. Ian more so as he was really worried about getting emotional in front of everyone so he thought this would alleviate some of that... he still cried as we said our vows though!"

Katherine is equally convinced that their first look was an unforgettable experience, and one that was perfect for their day. "Both of us agreed afterwards that it was the best thing we could have done to help calm our nerves and release some of the inevitable emotional build-up before the ceremony," she says, "not to mention wish each other luck and give each other a big hug!"

words Chris Wasey